Wednesday marked the last of three nights in a row of class, in an attempt to keep conditioning and also running through pieces of my routine. I’d been run down all week, either from vacation recovery (you know…getting back into life, massive amounts of errands, etc) or allergies. Monday’s class went slow for me, but I got some stuff done. Tuesday’s class…I remember doing conditioning for the straight leg splay shoulder mount and doing headstands, in which I realized that I could finally (*finally*) sweep my legs up in one fluid motion, instead of kicking up. That’s huge for me. So much strength that I didn’t have a couple of months ago!!! I was able to work on a spinning pole move that I learned in the class I took the other week, and just play on the spinning pole in general during my freestyle – it helps. More time on it is giving me some more balls with it, which is good. 🙂 Also, one of the girls in Tuesday had this bitchin’ freestyle to a hilarious song from a kid’s tv show – she rocked it. Gotta give her a nod for that!!

Wednesday’s class had more conditioning with certain things – shoulder mount again, for example – but I also worked on meathook, which is still a bit baffling, but I want to see how you would turn it into a dismount transition (that’s a future goal, I guess). I also took another pass at my twisted hand grip conditioning, holding the entry position, then holding the aerial ayesha in it, with Drea spotting me – she didn’t have to do much for the spotting, and while I wasn’t completely solid, I have come far. She gave me hug when I was done, saying how much stronger I’ve become. It’s such a nice thing to feel. I know there’s such a long road to go in terms of being aerial, but these are very important milestones.

She gave me some tough love on Monday about how I invert, telling me to remove a step that was a force of habit, which I no longer needed. I’ve been consciously working on it ever since, taking my time to think before I move. I also took a beat to think about my movement before I went into the twisted hand grip from the inversion position. As Drea had said, it’s good to be selfish and take a beat before you start anything – it’s also good to take the time to hold a trick and enjoy it.

I thought about that and realized it’s a bit of a life lesson, too. How many times do I go rushing through stuff in life? Go, go, go! Okay, doing this, going, done! How many times do we ALL do this? I realized that, in some ways, it might be inhibiting my growth and what I accomplish, because just because I jump to do something doesn’t mean I am doing it correctly or in the best manner possible. This is so true with pole. I’m so eager to try stuff and be able to get through the first pass of the trick (nerves!), and I want so much to be better, that I rush instead of taking the time to get it right. To take my time and be deliberate in my movement is so important to my growth and betterment as a poler. It’s going to be something that I carry with me now – a mental check that I can use from here on out.

Years ago, in my first pole related class, our teacher (who was also a life coach – the classes combined movement with life coaching) pointed out that I was always rushing – I move quickly and talk quickly and think quickly – but her assessment of this was that I was doing much of it to avoid being seen. If I moved quickly, unconsciously, I thought I would go unnoticed. But, as she said, I had to consider the possibility that people already saw me.

Let me tell you…that was dead on. It rocked me when I realized she was right. And, it still holds true. I will catch myself sometimes and realize that I am motoring down the street, and for what reason? One of the things she had us work on was just sitting and BEING. For me, that meant slowing down and being present to A LOT of stuff – and, in movement, I had to work really hard to slow it down. I still am conscious of it to this day, but for some reason, I never connected that I was going fast ON the pole – only in floor work. Kinda crazy to realize it now! But, at least I am now aware of it, accepting of it as part of who I am and something to work on, and interested in moving forward. 🙂

I took today off to work and spend time with my mom, who is in town visiting through the weekend. She’s actually coming with me to a teaser class at my pole studio on Saturday! It was her idea, which I love. I’m a mix of nervous, terrified, and excited – which, really, is all energy of the same kind. 🙂 I’m back to class on Sunday – possibly with a choreo session in the evening – and class Monday. Tuesday is a private lesson, Wednesday is my last class before the competition, and I have another choreo on Thursday. Eep!!! Got word that a major part of my costume will be arriving in time for the competition, which is so great – still need to pick up one piece and check on two that were custom ordered. I went heavy with the costume, but I’m leaning more toward “going all out” than not!

Once the competition is over, I’ll do a tally of what I spent on everything and post it – I did some mental math the other day and…wow. This is not a cheap endeavor! It’s such a learning experience in so many ways, though – love that. 🙂

Also, if you’re looking for a fun workshop, Kat of Pure Delish is teaching one of her infamous Twerkshops tomorrow (Friday 5/11) at 8pm! Follow the link to the invite page for more info! By the way, if you haven’t been in Pure Delish to shop, it is a MUST!

In honor of Kat, here’s her first-ever performance at Girl Next Door, from back in March! She’s supposed to be performing in the June show, which you MUST check out if you can!

I spent the weekend out of LA, taking a break from the swing of things and relaxing at a lovely little hot mineral springs retreat near Palm Springs. My last practice before I left was on Thursday, and it was…not great. I left fairly dejected. My friend was helping me run through choreo, and damn if that pole did not cooperate. I slid down it over and over again. Only after an incredible layer of iTac2 was I able to hold anything on the top end of the pole, but by then, my strength was wasted. I was dejected by my inability to nail a trick that is usually a signature for me, so much so that we made the decision to pull it from the routine. If I can’t nail it on a practice pole that is slippery, I can’t risk including it in the final routine and not nailing it again in the competition. That sucks. I love that trick. It’s a strong trick, one that not everyone can do, and my transition into it is unusual. But, it’s not a trick you can fuck up while getting into it, especially with the way I transition into it – you either stick it or you flail.

My friend tried to get my spirits up, focusing on how I had improved my opening choreo and had clearly worked on it, that I had more accomplished than she thought based on when we’d last met and what we’d discussed since then, but I still felt like it was a set back because I had felt so good after the last run-through in class. We worked on some floor choreo, which I need to play with and work into things now that I’m back from my mini vacation.

During the last leg of our trip, which was a photography expedition to an area on the coast of The Salton Sea called Bombay Beach (Google photos – it’s an amazing place for photography), we got a flat tire. While we waited for AAA to arrive, I took the opportunity to sign up for four additional pole classes over the next two weeks. I’ll be poling Monday through Wednesday, plus Sunday afternoon, all at my usual studio (and almost all with my usual instructor). It’s a huge commitment, both in time, energy, and money, but I figured out that I work better with people around – my solo rehearsals are rarely as effective when it comes to the pole runs. I do well with the floorwork in my solo time, but I have more energy, focus, and drive in class.

I’m also introducing my mom to pole on Saturday – there’s a teaser at my studio, and as a Mother’s Day outing, we’ll be going to class so she can see what it’s all about. I’m so jazzed, but also kinda nervous!

I have a few links to share, so let me get down to those…

First, a wonderful and inspiring post from a friend who has just begun her own pole journey (with a few pokes from me to do so) – I loved reading this, and I hope you will, too:

http://bonniegillespie.com/blog/the-pole-post/

Next, an incredibly touching video about believing in yourself and owning your own power – grab some tissues! It had me bawling, but in the very best way. While my own struggles are nowhere near this big, I will say that I did identify with his journey – it’s how I feel about pole half of the time:

Last, but not least…I’ve been fascinated with the idea of urban pole for a while, but never really had the guts to try it – mostly because  don’t think I’m at the level to be able to do it well. Nevertheless, I tried a few moves on our vacation this weekend, ending up with some scrapes and a lot of aborted attempts at inversions. 🙂

I have a new game. Whenever I find a new bruise, I ask myself, “Was it pole; dog care; or clumsiness?” [I work at a doggie daycare a few days a week, which frequently results in bruising.] It’s kind of fun. 🙂 I have some lovely new shiners on the back of my leg, which I think are from the dogs, but who really knows anymore.

Things had been slower on the training front as far as practical sessions, up until this weekend. With being on a budget and my usual rehearsal space closed temporarily, I worked on some stuff at home (frustrating) and ended up doing a lot of listening to the song over and over and over and over and…well, you get it. I also watched a lot of pole on YouTube. I do that anyway, but I was watching for ideas and inspiration.

Since I’m not well-versed on spinning pole, I was looking for less complicated moves I could try, to see if I could find something that felt natural to me – something I could turn into my own. As it turns out, even the simple ones I chose were a huge challenge to me. 🙂 My wonderful friend Claire offered me the use of her spinning pole – and her gloriously high ceiling – while I was sitting for her kitties this weekend, so I was able to get in some practice. After trying to not throw up my healthy breakfast and being really frustrated at not being able to make what seemed like a simple trick work, I started to work on some ideas for my spinning pole run. It was a tough rehearsal, but good to work things out. I realized how tired I will most likely be by that point in the routine and made changes to accommodate it.

I’m signed up for my first official spinning pole class, just so I can get some more time in on it – nervous, for sure, but it’s gotta be done. I made the room in my budget (which is admittedly very tight), and I’m going to do what I can to pick up some basic tips – by no means do I think I’ll be rocking it in two weeks, but I’d like to simply have a modicum of control over the damn thing. 🙂

My usual class tonight was tough, but good. I did more of the warm up – I usually opt for a lighter warm up, in order to save my strength for the tricks (we have murderous warm up sequences), but I did the entire sequence of planks – or more than I usually do. 🙂 I was wiped out, though. We had a fun surprise from our classmate who has been out for a month – she popped in to announce she’s pregnant (Congrats, Dani!), so we all had some sparkling cider and chatted before getting down to business. Drea had me rehearse my ideas for my static pole run over and over, so she could find the points that need polishing, and we could throw out anything that wasn’t working. I have some stuff to fix, but I think I have a reasonably solid combination of tricks that I do well. It was challenging, but EXCELLENT to get that rehearsal in. I really love my pole home. 🙂

In addition to my routine stuff, we also learned a new trick – which we were calling the Unicorn (the name given to it by Kat, who disliked the actual name – which I think is either Rainbow or Stargazer?). I worked on my aerial twisted handgrip pencil – so close! – and did one shoulder mount, just to continue practicing it. I was wiped by the time we got to free dance, so my dance was a little lazy, but I did what I could for both songs.

After a long soak in an epson salt bath, I’m going to curl up with my heating pad and my ibuprofen, and hope I’m not too sore in the morning. 🙂 I’ll need my strength for the spinning pole class, and training is going to increase from here – there are transitions to nail, nuances to add, and stamina to build – oh, that stamina!

Speaking of Kat, she’s teaching a twerking workshop at The Choreography House on Friday, May 11th – check it out!

And, of course, I’ll leave you with an incredible video…

I was back in my normal class last night, which is such an interesting and inspiring place to be. The girls are SO tough – strong, willful, ballsy women who push each other to be better. They’re a tight knit group, and I joined late, so I do a lot of observation of the others. There’s so much support in the room – the girls usually have a chosen partner that they team with each night, for spotting, breakdown of tricks, even photos (there are a lot of photos in our class). I love getting to see the difference in what we can all do, and I mean that in the best way – how Casey has become a little pole monkey, or Kelly’s extension on the Flatline, or Beth’s super bendy back, how Morgan nailed an aerial ayesha, how Mary Grace is the picture of grace and fluidity, etc.

Most of all, I’ve been so grateful lately to have the guidance and support of my instructor, Drea – she’s given me invaluable tips recently, in regards to the competition, but she’s always been so wonderful to all of us. Especially being that this is my first competition, and I’m probably in over my head, she’s been really sweet about giving me suggestions and tips.

Last night’s class was excellent. I went home afterward, bouncy and hyper and obsessively chattering about pole. I can feel the difference in my strength since starting training – I was able to do things that have given me problems for a year, which is SO gratifying. I worked on the moves that Drea broke down for us, also taking time to work on ideas for pole runs, transitions and possible combos for the competition, coming up with one I like better than the one I was going to go with originally. I worked on the spinning pole during our freestyle, so I can get used to it, and by the end of class, had all but scrapped what I was planning on doing because it just doesn’t work on spinning. As much as I need to nail down the exact things going into the routine, it was also really good to realize, “Hey, this doesn’t work” NOW, as opposed to trying and trying to make it work and having to scrap it later on. Sure, it means going back to the drawing board today and trying to mentally work out where things will go for the next few days, but I think I can log in some good time to work it out.

I’m in search of a new practice space, as my current one is closed for a bit – my home pole isn’t the right height to really do a full rehearsal, but I can definitely do a good portion of it there, now that I’ve rearranged my living room and opened up the space. I’ll be working today on floor work ideas (rehearsing certain things over and over, including my opening choreo), as well as listening to my song and seeing where I think certain stuff can flow.

Can’t believe it’s only 4 weeks away! *faints*

Side note: each week in class, we all work on our aerial pencil (from twisted hand grip), and I am SO CLOSE to nailing it – I’ve gotten it a couple of times, but am not yet able to hold it for the full five seconds of conditioning without a spotter. But, I work on it every class, because someday soon, it will be mine. 🙂 Drea is spotting me in this pic, although she’s in the process of backing out of it, as I was so close to getting it on my own. Soon, pencil. Soon you will be mine.

Pencil, you are almost mine!

After a few days off from rehearsal, I went in for a quick session today. My last rehearsal was on Wednesday, with my wonderful friend who is helping me choreography the routine. We worked really hard, and I was wiped out afterward – physically and mentally.

It was an illuminating experience, to say the least. I realized that there was so much that I didn’t know – and that I had no idea that I hadn’t known it. I had to really work to not beat myself up about all of the little things I wasn’t cognizant of prior to this rehearsal; I had to work to not think too hard or too far ahead. I kept thinking about how I simply didn’t know what I didn’t know – stuff that might seem glaringly obvious, but which hadn’t sunk in yet.

I spent the last few days decompressing, being in my life, doing other things, but also spent time listening to my routine song over and over again, working out ideas for moves that work with the music. I headed back in this afternoon to rehearse, doing and extended stretching session to start, then mapping out the measurements for the stage. I wanted to see what I’d be working with as far as distances to cover, etc. I ran through my opening choreo over and over, playing with musicality and where I needed to be during different moments, etc – I started playing with move ideas while the song ran out (instead of just skipping back to the start), doing climbs, trying different tricks or poses, all of which were helpful conditioning. I left pretty happy, so that’s good.

I am hoping to simply work at it a little at a time, bit by bit, building my stamina while I build muscle memory. Of course, it’s hard to not thinking ahead and worry about stuff, but I’m doing my best to take it day by day, acknowledging the achievements as they come. 🙂

On a side note, you now have only 45 minutes left to get tickets at the discounted rate of $20!!! The price goes up after midnight tonight, PST!! Get them here: http://www.pacificpolechampionships.com/tickets-and-venue/

Here’s a fun video that has been making the rounds – Enjoy!